Alas, No Magic!

Alright, I finally give up on my quest! I’ve searched, I have searched, and I’ve double searched, but it seems like Melbourne doesn’t have a single magic shop. I told myself that this realm couldn’t possibly be devoid of the mystic arts, but three visits to novelty joke shops later and I’m starting to see the truth.

Golly, imagine that! All these things they do, it’s all just using the natural, physical sciences. I just started working in an ‘office’ and they’ve got window glass frosting, which is also quite a common touch we add to the castle windows. It’s a simple thing, really: just add a layer of magically-immortalised ice between the two panes of glass and you have a lovely frost effect. I commented to Canto, the fellow who sits behind me, that the creator of this mystic effect did a wonderful job in crafting the ice so that the panes don’t even look like they have anything between them. He gave me a look like I was a street urchin tugging at the robes of the arch-mage and garbling some claptrap about having a magical birthmark than meant they’re the prophesied chosen one. Nine out of ten times that simply isn’t true, you know.

Now that I’ve trawled the entire city in search of true magic, I’m sadly forced to conclude that they don’t have any. Which partially explains why Ivan took my frosted window glass comment with such bemusement, but it doesn’t explain the ire. Seriously, he comes in every day with the starting attitude of a person who’s had their parking space stolen, their sandwich eaten and their favourite mug broken, and his mood rarely improves beyond that level.

Frosted glass is a scientific endeavour, I suppose. And commercial tinting here in Melbourne, that also must be done with science. I had mistaken it for the clever arcane sealing of a shadow goblin in its gaseous form inside a pane of glass, but…probably not.