Finally, a second season of Escape to the Country! The first season was a smash hit, but some stuffy network executives raised a big furor about laws being broken, and television standards being breached, and something about the network “descending into barbarism” and whatnot. I, for one, fail to see anything unethical about a family being assaulted by ninjas in the middle of the night, fleeing for their lives while bleeding and panicked, while the whole thing is secretly filmed and aired on prime-time television.
Anyway, they fired all those executives, got in some with a sense of fun, and season two opened with a family coming across a home with some very nice set of balustrades – clearly, some residential glazier work Melbourne can be proud of. Naturally, the only reason the family was looking around this country home was because they’d been set upon by a cadre of dangerous magical ninjas. Well, they look magical. I’m sure it’s all clever ninja misdirection, like when the parents had to dive under the bed to avoid being set on fire by an exploding tag, or when their youngest son was forced to fend off a flaming demon fox with a hockey stick. Such mad fun!
One day, someone’s going to explain to them that it was all on national television, and they’ll have a good laugh.
The husband and wife agreed that the greatest strength of the place was that it’s being surrounded by a couple of acres with nothing but grass, meaning that it’d be difficult to sneak up on them. Oh, and there was yet another set of lovely glass stair balustrades leading down to the basement. They didn’t notice that, of course. They were too busy gushing over how they could take shelter there if the ninjas attacked again. Honestly, just because your very lives are in jeopardy doesn’t mean you can’t appreciate some excellent glazing work.